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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!
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But then, just as I’m about to take a bite of this heavenly treat, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. He’s like, “Get back to work!” Ugh, the worst timing ever! I’m torn between my duty and this delicious stroopwafel. I mean, priorities, right?
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